This week Mummy didn’t take me to KSP. I had all these interesting writes to do and she didn’t take me.
At first I thought that she might be going late. What with her moaning about Spring and acting all sleepy. Lazy that’s what I call it. Well its lazy for humans, spaniels only have a limited amount of energy that they must guard carefully and use sparingly. That is not lazy, that is clever resource management. Not taking your favourite spaniel to writing club is lazy.
But no, around lunch time, Daddy took Mummy and the Tabletty little thing away. And I was not allowed to come. And yes it was lunchtime and no they did not leave me any lunch; people food lunch that is. Alone and lunchless I cried and then I plotted my revenge and then I had a nap and then the man who gives me treats came and gave me treats then he made his loud noises around the house and made everything smell like bleach. Grandma came home with Cat and the other little thing, I told them all about Mummy and Daddy and the poor lunchless spaniel. I had some treats, played with the dogs and practiced sad faces.
Mummy, Daddy and Tablett came home with food so I pretended to forgive them. After I had cleverly avoided not being fed I gave them the ignore they deserved followed by ages of ‘Poor Baby’, a brilliant game where I pretend to be depressed, everyone makes a big fuss of me and Daddy pretends I am spoilt, silly Daddy.
I did not get what I wanted. It was a bad day.
I am saddened by the callousness of my fellow beings. Oh not you dear reader, you would not treat a poor innocent spaniel like that, now would you?
Yours in all sincerity,
Charles, King and Cavalier, Spaniel.