autistsix

Spring!

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by

autistsix
in

Spring is the season of Pollen

Relentless attacks without pause

Fluttering into our faces

Sneaking under closed doors.

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My face is terribly swollen

My nose no longer drips

Instead it oozes like molasses

Until it inevitably slips.

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My eyes are perpetually itchy

My throat and ears scratch and burn.

My head is painful and heavy

For pity’s sake don’t make me turn.

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I can’t eat I’m really too nauseous

And full of muck oozing down my throat

I can’t drink I feel I am drowning

Now I’m chilled and need a coat.

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And Pollen continues through Summer

When the sun tries to bake us alive.

I’m sick of Global Warming

In a New Ice Age I’d thrive.

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Goldenrod flowers

 

Pollen, I have to tell you

I only eat sugar and meat

Kill the vegetarians

They’re the enemy to beat.

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Comments

12 responses to “Spring!”

  1. stefano baroni Avatar
    stefano baroni

    U forgot the vegans…… get rid of them as well!!!!! LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Reply
    1. autistsix Avatar
      autistsix

      Oh no, I forgot the vegans, they must die first!

      Reply
  2. codeinfig Avatar
    codeinfig

    hilarious, i just second-guessed the post about peta and other “vegetar-orists” (though i didnt use that word, i just made it up for this one– and i wish it would stay tongue-in-cheek but someday, i wouldnt put it past them) although the post was mostly about how pixies coat appears to be excellent for removing makeup.

    it was hypothetical on so many levels (it involved people taking peta seriously– as if, and also i dont wear makeup) but it got too longwinded and silly, and HEY! look at the time…

    but this is my favourite poem of yours after– well, technically that one is a song. but i like it that much!

    Reply
    1. autistsix Avatar
      autistsix

      Thank you muchly!

      Reply
  3. codeinfig Avatar
    codeinfig

    also: SALAD IS MURDER!

    Reply
    1. autistsix Avatar
      autistsix

      Sing it!

      Reply
  4. xaspierudegirlx Avatar
    xaspierudegirlx

    Usually I hate to argue so I will leave one comment. I don’t have a problem with Vegetarians or Vegans and I didn’t really sense that from her poem either, more so the joke was vegetarians eat you, so they should be the enemy. The same way we are the enemy of animals. Before I continue I will also stress I am a meat eater (but I am not really proud of it, and I am not for the suffering of animals) however Peta doesn’t stand for anything really. Most vegans and vegetarians speak against Peta for false advertising and it being too extreme. However to pretend no animal abuse or suffering goes on in places that produce our meat is joke. When they are producing to feed MILLIONS of people, there are gonna be mistakes, and there are going to be places that don’t keep up to code and try to fly under the radar to make a living. I’d be stupid to say everything I eat was raised well, effing organic and shit. No what we do to keep the population happy is brutal sometimes, and it doesn’t just end with meat. We have become numb to it though. As much as sure cows, pigs etc were basically created for us to eat at the dinner table, they still have feelings, they are no different than any other living thing on this earth. The only meat eaters that annoy the crap out of me is they will eat meat here in the western world but they tell people they shouldn’t eat horses cause they are just so amazing and cute, or Asia shouldn’t kill dogs and eat them because here they are seen as house pets. MEAT is all the same, and people will eat simply what is available to them to survive. A dog is no higher than a pig or cow just because we see them here as cuddly house pets. They all feel the same tbh.

    I tried to go vegan once, but it was too damn hard to tell you the truth. And what I HATE is unhealthy vegans, they are like blah blah meat is bad and then all they eat is pasta and look anorexic. Those are the only vegans and vegetarians I don’t like. Other than that if you are a healthy vegan or vegetarian than all the power to you. Wish I could do the same, cause call me sensitive I HATE the thought of any animal suffering or being treated less. And now we have proven with the way humans have evolved we can live healthy without meat. So the pro meat eaters need to get over that argument imo. xD

    Reply
    1. autistsix Avatar
      autistsix

      Thank you for your comment! Yes I have nothing against vegetarians, it was meant to be a comedic “Get them, spare me!’ idea.
      I do agree with much of what you say; the way some animals are treated is repugnant and needs to be changed. I think unfortunately extremists have actually made moderates feel dis empowered to make positive change. I agree meat is meat, I believe animals destined to be meat deserve a decent life, but I do not believe pets (irregardless of the species) should be killed and eaten by their loved ones, in some sort of teaching kids about the realities of food production.
      I do disagree somewhat with the idea that humans have evolved to a point where a no meat diet is the most sustainable diet. But that is a very complicated argument and I would like to agree to disagree while respecting each others rights.
      I hope you are not offended by our joking in the comments! It is all in fun, there are so few stereotyped groups we are allowed to make fun of anymore.

      Reply
      1. xaspierudegirlx Avatar
        xaspierudegirlx

        I figured that was what you were saying in your poem. No I am not offended at all, and I figured people were joking haha. I was more replying to the ‘Peta’ comment cause I know most vegans don’t fall for the false advertising of Peta as Peta is a horrid organization. lol I have met some very educated vegetarians and vegans, and even if it is not my kinda diet, I support them. Sometimes I wish I could go Vegan tbh because I am so against animal cruelty it is one of the few things in this world that can make me cringe and really pissed off.

        The thing is here we see dogs as pets, I don’t think they are treated the same in other cultures though and like that are used for meat because not everyone has the same sources of meat. I know Asians have a lot of fish etc, but they are not populated by cows, pigs etc like we are in the western world. To me it is just a different culture but it is all the same in the end. If you are against killing one animal then you should be against killing all of them. Does that make sense? In the end nations eat what we can get our hands on and what is simply available. Asians don’t have farms and stuff I believe like we do and that is why they are known for using other sources of meat. But it’s all the same in the end. In our culture we see them as pets, I am not sure if Asians have pet cats and dogs. Never honestly looked into it, but I do know they lack sources of meat and need meat just like everybody else so they get what they can get.

        I totally am not offended at all, we haven’t entirely evolved where we don’t need meat entirely, but humans are getting there. With so many sources of food and different kinds of food especially here in the western world, vegans can relatively live a very healthy lifestyle without meat. In fact most vegans have to be more educated when it comes to diets because they don’t eat meat and normally end up in my opinion in some ways being healthier than those that do eat meat because they pay such close attention to their diets. If you ask me there are very few in the western world that you would call healthy. Our diet is deep fried food, too much red meat, too much sugar and fast food that we aren’t really the example of healthy eating. xD I am guilty of all of the above. haha I know I eat way too much red meat for example and have actually been looking into ways of cutting it more out of my diet, not cut it out, but eat it less and come up with different meal ideas. It has effected my health, and that was the only thing I saw in my diet that could be bad cause I do try to overall eat good balanced meals and snacks. So yeah go meat eaters and go vegans/vegetarians! 🙂 As long as you are educated about your diet, we have such a choice in food now you can pretty much lead a relative healthy lifestyle I think.

  5. codeinfig Avatar
    codeinfig

    “Peta doesn’t stand for anything really. Most vegans and vegetarians speak against Peta for false advertising and it being too extreme. However to pretend no animal abuse or suffering goes on in places that produce our meat is joke.”

    totally agreed, by the way. i dont think anyone here would really pretend that no animal abuse or suffering happens in places that produce meat, in general.

    “And now we have proven with the way humans have evolved we can live healthy without meat.”

    nope. its also possible to swim across the atlantic, but that doesnt mean people wont drown trying. what there is evidence for is that a good number of people can sustain an arguably healthy existence without meat. i think it gets a little more complicated once you try to apply that lifestyle to everyone–

    humanity has never survived on an entirely vegetarian diet and theres still no proof thats possible, unless starvation or illness can be called “living healthy.” i think youre taking a trend and making a rule. but i also think it would be pretty cool *if* someone proves youre right at some point. we arent there yet, unless you take the word of one group as gospel. how do you know (this is an honest question) that being vegetarian isnt simply a great feat, like climbing mount everest? healthy for some, = safe for everyone? real data, please.

    Reply
    1. autistsix Avatar
      autistsix

      I think we are closer to the same opinion than differing. Just as long as this is a discussion between friends with different opinions. I would be devastated if anyone took this personally.
      There are arguments on both sides and additional complications like consuming bugs etc.
      We haven’t got the best system, we need discussion to find it.

      Reply
      1. codeinfig Avatar
        codeinfig

        im happy to cede when science really backs up the claim that everyone can be vegetarian and be healthy.

        until then, im happy that some people can manage it. im not offended by the implication that i would kill fish and birds just to make lunch more interesting, but until science backs that up i must add: i cannot support that claim against me yet!

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