So this morning we had a relaxing exercise at Tuesday Writer’s Club. Tony is joining us by telephone. You are not going to believe this; Tony does not have a computer. At all, by choice.
So here is my attempt at the challenging task.
The Easter Bunny has finished his work…
“Never again,” He sighed.
The bartender sniggered.
“Never again,” chorused the other rabbits in the Egg and Bonnet. “Never again will I eat all the eggs that break. I think I hate chocolate.”
“Never again will I eat all…” said the Easter Bunny. “Hey!”
The rabbits all laughed, the Bartender, Bester Bunny’s sniggers turning to deep throaty guffaws.
“Well I suppose it’s only-“ Easter Bunny started.
“Once a year!” the Bar flies shouted then doubled over with giggles.
“Thank you very much for all your support, Friends.” The way he said friends made a few of the rabbits stop laughing.
“We were only joshing Easter mate,” said a portly young grey rabbit.
“No you were trying to make me feel small and insignificant,” Easter Bunny started to sob. “Well you should feel good, you have succeeded. I’m sorry I don’t meet your ex..pec…tat…” Easter Bunny was crying too hard to finish.
All the laughter stopped, as the rabbits stared at their feet and shuffled. An older white Bunny put a comforting paw on the Easter Bunny’s shoulder.
“We’re sorry Eastie,” said the old gent.
“We were just teasing, I’m sorry we went too far,” added Bester putting a glass of best elderflower wine in front of the Easter Bunny.
The Easter Bunny couldn’t contain his giggle anymore. He grinned and said, “I might think about forgiving you. Except I just got you all. Revenge is better than forgiveness.”
“Is that the new motto of the season?” A wiry young brown Rabbit generally known as Rapid spoke with almost palpable sarcasm.
“Wouldn’t surprise me!” came a voice from the door.
“Hi Dad!” said Easter Bunny quickly finishing his glass before his father could see it.
Bester quickly but surreptitiously filled the glass with carrot juice.
The retired Easter Bunny hobbled in, leaning heavily on a cane of carrotwood (rare and very precious), he picked up Easer Bunny’s glass sniffing the contents. He raised his eyebrow at his son, his hooded eyelids said it all; there was no fooling the old rabbit.
“In my day” The old rabbit turned so he could see more of the Bar flies,” it was eggs, plain eggs, not even chocolate and each child was lucky to get three and they were grateful, damn grateful and…” Easter Bunny mouthed along with his father’s speech.
Unfortunately when the retired Easter Bunny saw a young Calico smirking he turned suddenly mid-sentence and caught his son.
“You are not too old to go over my knee, young man!” he shouted.
“Actually, Dad,” Easter Bunny was too tired and fed up to indulge his old man. “I am half again your height and I could bench press 3 of you without breaking a sweat.”
“You young whippersnapper, how dare you?” the Bunny family patriarch sputtered with rage.
“Sorry Dad, improved diet, improved life.” Easter Bunny shrugged. “Anyway its not the kids fault. Media has manipulated their expectations, fortunately wise investments including in our own manufacturing plant has made it easy to keep up with demand without having to reduce quality.”
“Gobbledy Gook! Are you an Easter Bunny or the CEO of an international pomegranate.”
Easter Bunny thought about correcting him but couldn’t be bothered. He sighed, “And the fact that children in your day were that grateful for basic nutrition is not a great recommendation for the Good Old Days.”
“They were the Good Old Days, children knew their place, if they were not appropriately grateful they got a whippi-“ the retired Easter Bunny stopped, he shook his head. “I don’t know what I’m saying.” He laughed.
The rest of the bar laughed, softly and gentlemanly, no one wanted to set the old crackpot off again.
“Give us a drink Bester,” Easter Bunny’s dad sounded happier. “Touch that carrot bottle and I’ll punch you. Cowslip wine for me and my Boy!”