Autism Is Hilarious, Cricket Not So Much

Sometimes when one of my children does something totally crazy; like refusing to stop pouring my drink even though I have already poured myself one; until I have to wrestle the can out of her hand; because her father told her to fill it to half.

I think Autism is hilarious!

Unless you have to live with it!

Which I do!

I had a point at some stage, maybe?

And while I have you here I have a complaint!

Like bewildered wives all over Australia; and probably Britain, India, New Zealand, South Africa and the West Indies to name but a few, I was asked ‘can I watch a bit of the cricket’.  I don’t know who was playing, I have a suspicion it may have been an interstate game even though some famous cricketing nation has a team here; I wanna say Pakistan but I’m not sure.  I think it may have been WA and I heard something about Melbourne; but they keep replaying old footage of other games in the middle so I’m never sure what’s going on.

Irregardless of all of my lack of interest in the game I said “Of course I don’t mind!”  Which I don’t actually; Gavin deserves so much and asks so little.  Besides I actually like hearing him talk about the cricket & making me watch replays (the interesting bits with notes) and the birds.

Cricket has gotten a lot faster than it used to be but commentators can’t seem to forget the great bird watching tradition in cricket.  It was so slow in the old days that the commentators would go on for hours about the grass (actually apparently the grass is important but really they are talking about watching grass grow) so if a bird happened to land on the field the commentators would get all excited and show pictures of it, commentating on everything it did and its possible motivations.

Back to my watching modern cricket, I only object to being left alone with the cricket.  You know men; he switches it on and then wanders off to potter around the garage or has a nap.  But the thing I really can’t stand is when he walks in and asks a question like “How did he get out?”

“Who got out?” I ask, “Did someone get out?”

“Well you were watching!”

“I think I heard them say Bradman?” I attempt.

“Bradman doesn’t play anymore, even you know that!  It must have been a replay, or did someone break a record?”  he gets excited.

I look at him blankly & describe a few things, something I or the commentators say gives him enough information & he tells me what I saw.  Actually I would never say Bradman I know he played in the 1930’s so if I hear his name I’m curious & look more closely.  But I do know the names of a lot of players and still don’t know what they look like or when they played.

But the straw that broke the camel’s back today was when I was quietly watching the cricket and Gavin started swearing at the screen.  Why on Earth was I watching Cricket if even he wasn’t enjoying it.

I give up!