Agoraphobia. Part 2

Part 1

The second eldest doesn’t object to going out, she doesn’t cooperate but at least she doesn’t object.  Why don’t I ask her if she wants to go out?  Because half the time she is nonverbal, and discussing feelings or going places is likely to trigger her.  When she is awake properly she is incredibly intelligent and well informed; we see this maybe 6-9 hours a week.  Most of the time she is dazed, confused and frequently stimming or fainting; she is just a barrel of monkeys.  However I get the impression that she subconsciously objects to leaving the safety of home because she tends to respond to imminent departure by sleeping/fainting or removing essential clothing.  I interpret this as an indication that she may not be enraptured by the prospect of an excursion into reality.


The oldest of the youngsters (a teen now) A.K.A. (also known as) The Silence does she like going out?  How on Earth would I know!  She never discusses her feelings with me!  Her reaction to anything that even vaguely could become emotional or require a decision is to become completely silent and look like a deer in the headlights.  I would say a brain dead deer in the headlights but that is why my husband, mother & eldest child always suggest that I am not the best one to continue said conversations, and will I stop shouting abuse, and mumbling abuse is not what they meant.  I’m not the world’s most patient person but… no I guess that’s it.  Number 3 is easier to deal with if external stimuli is reduced which tends to suggest she is facing the same disincentives to join the rest of the world.  At the moment though she does seem to want to leave the house; she loves school, has a boyfriend, goes to sleepovers and is very involved with choir & community and school theatre.


The youngest who is a preteen (if you are reading this you are so a preteen) would she prefer life on the outside?  There are a lot of things she enjoys in the real world; her friends, choir and drama.  But she tries to stay home from school, choir and Drama.  If I would let her stay home would she ever ask to go anywhere?  I seriously don’t believe so!  Perhaps she would want to go somewhere but given free choice it would always be; tomorrow!

Part 3

Published by autistsix

An autistic woman married to an autistic man trying to raise 4 autistic daughters in a neurotypical world

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